-Entrapment-
I sit in my room and think about the current events. I stare out the window on this cold and rainy night, watching the drops fall down like passing memories. I think back to recent events and the confusions that follow them, and how I came to be in the life that I am currently in. All I can think about is Her. I shouldn't, but there's nothing I can do about this mystery We call love. The problem is the fact that She is a book I have read, and read well. She is no stranger to me, in fact I can call Her my best friend. However, We have always had an attraction toward one another. One fateful week, We did what should have been done years ago. The moment was not as romantic as I had hoped, but I was in Euphoria nonetheless. Her lips were soft, much softer than I had anticipated. It was something I had only hoped for in my dreams. Time passed throughout that weekend, my love for Her grew and grew. She would kiss me tenderly as I tried to talk, spreading my words apart. With each kiss, focus was lost more and more. It was much more than I could ever dream of. But reality broke down on Us. She was heartbroken. Her heart was broken by a man whom I myself call my best friend. I entered this sticky situation knowingly. I was ready for all of the punches. I was ready for Her. But reality got in the way. Now Time is all that stands before me. Painstaking time. Her heart must mend, while mine weeps for her embrace once more. All I can possibly desire now is Her love.
-Silence-
My hands wander as I type, and I notice that the Unconscious is particularly silent. The rain had ceased its war against my window and the piano sonata emanating from my speakers have quieted abruptly. It is quiet. A chill sends itself down my body, not in fear but in loneliness. I switch the music back on in hopes to lose myself in memories. The kiss. The embrace. The sweet words. I try to forget the present. I dare not live in the past, but the past isn't past when it was only a week ago. It's funny how I told Her how all I wanted right now was to simply see someone, meet someone new, learn more about them. She was better than that. I already know Her, and I knew that I wanted Her. But now my mind wanders to what it wants now. Either Her, or someone new, stands in front of me. I ponder what steps I should take. My heart tells me to see what Time decides. And so I will wait. I look out the window. I think about that night. How I wish that that night occurred long ago. My heart wonders how different things would have been. And so I ask You tonight. What if things were different in your life?
